Why A "Happiness Project?”
I’m obsessed with happiness. I think about it constantly: in the shower, while stuck in traffic, while I’m cooking (one of the activities that makes me happiest). I want to know why, when all that divides happiness from its alternative is a shift in perspective, it can be so difficult for some folks to be cheerful? I want to know why the people around me make the choices they do, when it seems so obvious to me that different choices would bring higher levels of contentment? I want to know why, at times, it’s impossible for me to apply that same common sense to my own life? Don't think I'm unaware of the hypocrisy--I have periods of serious deficiency in the happiness department, even as I so wisely concoct cheerfulness potions for the people around me.
The Only Goal That Matters
All I've ever done is set goals. If there were awards for goal setting, I definitely would have won at least three, and if my goals included being One Helluva Good Goal-Setter, I could die tomorrow.
I set goals because I’ve read statistics. Folks who write down their goals make up only 3-5% of the population and THEY SUCCEED DAMNIT! Way more often than the 95-97% that don't have clear goals and...don't succeed. It was a very scientific study.
I have filled my days with lists of aspirations—small to tall, and a million things in between. Tackling my overwhelming "To Do" list feels like running in a hamster wheel; like I'm entrenched in the "Rat Race," a "slave to the grind." My stomach hurts, I'm irritable with customer service reps and loved ones, and I ask how the checker is at Ralph's but I don't really listen to the answer.
Then one day in a workshop, I stumble upon an interesting concept. A participant is asked to tell the audience what her number one wish is for herself in her current life situation. Her response is familiar.
All I've ever done is set goals. If there were awards for goal setting, I definitely would have won at least three, and if my goals included being One Helluva Good Goal-Setter, I could die tomorrow.
I set goals because I’ve read statistics. Folks who write down their goals make up only 3-5% of the population and THEY SUCCEED DAMNIT! Way more often than the 95-97% that don't have clear goals and...don't succeed. It was a very scientific study.
Then one day in a workshop, I stumble upon an interesting concept. A participant is asked to tell the audience what her number one wish is for herself in her current life situation. Her response is familiar.
“More money.”
The speaker then prompts her to complete the sentence,
“Because money provides you with…what?”
After a moment’s thought, the woman responds,
“Security.”
“Then why not just wish for security, and accept whatever that ends up looking like?”
Hmmm. Maybe I've been missing the point. Maybe the specific goals of “successful CEO of a multi-level Event Production Company”, “four-time triathlete,” and “accomplished novelist” were actually short-sighted. Maybe what I really need to be aiming for is…happiness.
And embrace whatever it is that comes with that.
And embrace whatever it is that comes with that.
Enjoy Right Now
And with that simple shift in thinking, I lose my attachment to being 32 and CEO of a company that consists of myself and a negligible profit margin, and instead am able to celebrate the small catering gig that will bring in a couple hundred bucks that I'm doing for a friend next month. Because, in truth, that small job makes me immensely happy. For the first time, I'm forgiving of myself and I'm proud of my baby steps. I enjoy my day and my involvement in a satisfying project; I become "lighter."
It makes me understand that if somehow I can make a commitment to continue doing this, I will absolutely take flight. Because being happy is the key to being great; to doing great things, and creating great art, being a great friend, to achieving your best possible self!
It's Easy to be "Heavy," Tough to be "Light"
It is no simple feat however (no siree), to make a commitment to a constant exploration of happiness. It will take generosity (key to spreading happiness). It will take devotion (to creating an environment of joviality). When all else fails, it will take baked goods. Or a really good martini...But ultimately, who cares what it takes?! I plan to enjoy the process of discovering!
By redefining what the end looks like, perhaps we can enjoy the means by which we get there. Our goal is delight. In every minute. With every breath. We owe it to ourselves. For what other purpose are we here?
So that's why.
And with that simple shift in thinking, I lose my attachment to being 32 and CEO of a company that consists of myself and a negligible profit margin, and instead am able to celebrate the small catering gig that will bring in a couple hundred bucks that I'm doing for a friend next month. Because, in truth, that small job makes me immensely happy. For the first time, I'm forgiving of myself and I'm proud of my baby steps. I enjoy my day and my involvement in a satisfying project; I become "lighter."
It makes me understand that if somehow I can make a commitment to continue doing this, I will absolutely take flight. Because being happy is the key to being great; to doing great things, and creating great art, being a great friend, to achieving your best possible self!
It's Easy to be "Heavy," Tough to be "Light"
It is no simple feat however (no siree), to make a commitment to a constant exploration of happiness. It will take generosity (key to spreading happiness). It will take devotion (to creating an environment of joviality). When all else fails, it will take baked goods. Or a really good martini...But ultimately, who cares what it takes?! I plan to enjoy the process of discovering!
By redefining what the end looks like, perhaps we can enjoy the means by which we get there. Our goal is delight. In every minute. With every breath. We owe it to ourselves. For what other purpose are we here?
So that's why.
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